I got hold of this 'fetish map' a few years ago, and decided to do my own version. I was quite disappointed by the organisation, which is superficial rather than psychological, focussing on outward expressions and paraphernalia of basic fetishes without constructing any connections between the underlying motivations. It makes it look like my fetishes are fairly random, when actually they all arise from one or two key points. Still, I suppose not everyone's motivations are the same, but it might be interesting to construct a map where the key areas, rather than "animals", "clothes", "oral" etc, were "helplessness", "control", "exhibitionism", etc.
(The following isn't not exclusive, because I'm not sure I'm capable of articulating every single fetish I have, and also fetishes are catching, so I'm sure I'll accumulate more from lovers at some point.)
"Classic S/M" - spanking, piercing, branding, suspension, heavy bondage, cutting, blood
Slightly annoying they don't distinguish between giving/receiving, and don't give CP its own category. Also disappointing that D/s isn't here. Yes, embarrassment and non-consent can be part of D/s, but why isn't the root fetish here?
Suspension and decorative bondage are a different fetish for me than D/s or sexual bondage, closer to corsetry or fetish heels than submission. Decorative bondage, suspension, rope corsets are for me about body-as-canvas, like modelling, which is about a combination of objectification and exhibitionism with the physical pleasure of restraint/pain for the sake of aesthetics. It's about showing off, being attractive for the pleasure of others, pride, objectification, becoming a decorative object. (Like pony play and connected to human furniture).
Added to the above list of specific "minor fetishes" within s/m (wtf? Spanking totally isn't a minor fetish) I'd have added caning as a specific fetish, beating with implements in general, hair-pulling, pinwheels (as distinct from piercing), scratching with nails (as distinct from cutting), face-slapping (as distinct from spanking), and wrestling/punchplay as a form of sadomasochism. Both being punished (personal; degraded) and being used (impersonal; someone taking pleasure in me). Painful bondage (although maybe that's what "heavy bondage" means), painful tight-lacing, painful fetish heels are all s/m-related but fit into the "decorative" category, which leans slightly more towards submission in the same way that caning, for me, leans slightly more towards masochism.
Clothing: military gear, lingerie, corsets, stockings, gloves Military gear: only if pre-C20th. C17th-18th land militia preferred over naval uniforms. Cavalry is the best. This fetish is about "things I like someone topping me to be wearing", although I admit I also get a kick out of wearing it myself in a pulling-rank scenario. Oh, and pretty girls in pre-C20th military drag.
Lingerie: this is more about the "being found pleasing" thing than anything else. Liking for stockings is based around my Doms appreciating them; similiarly my suspender belt thing is because I'm told it provides a beautiful frame for CP play. I quite like the whole "being slutty" game as well, with (e.g.) black lingerie still carrying associations of being a harlot in this culture.
Corsetry: As explained above. It's part of the overall retro-fetish I have (fashions and styles from 1700-1900 are sexy). It's also about pain, decorativeness, aestheticism, body modification, and the edge that makes it really, really hot is from the whole history of oppression associated with women being forced to wear uncomfortable and damaging clothing.
Gloves: mainly associated with retro fetish (see Sarah Water's Fingersmith: nobility wearing white gloves permanently, and the intimacy associated with removing them). Conversely, being caressed by someone wearing silk/velvet/leather gloves is hot not only because of the different sensations, but the impersonality/lack of intimacy implied.
Shoe fetish
Specifically, high heels that are restrictive/painful. This is mostly a D/s thing, strongly associated with the "decorative objectification" thing.
Pony play
OMG this gets me so hot. As far as I can tell, the breakdown goes as follows:
Physical sensations: restrictive harnesses (sense of enclosure around head/body), restricted vision (blinkers), restricted movement (hoof mittons or arm lacings). Exercise as a fetish: specifically, being forced by use of whips or other implements to exert oneself. Bits are connected to gags in being an oral bondage fetish. Tails attached by use of butt plugs as part of the fetish for anal sensation, specifically forceful/painful anal penetration. The hoof boots are the restrictive/painful high heels fetish. The riding crop aspect is bog standard s/m. Submission that is enhancing rather than degrading: the decorative thing, being a pretty object/pet, existing for the pleasure of others, being the centre of attention, being shown off to enhance the status of another, being proud and beautiful and wilful yet still submissive, possessed, controlled, thus increasing the power/meaning of the submission. Pulling a trap/carriage on which one's master is riding is connected to the "human furniture" thing: being genuinely useful to one's Dominant, serving them in actual and practical ways.
Cat play
This is much less of a thing for me, and is largely connected to the wrestling/playfighting/scratching fetish. Also growling at each other is hot, being overpowered/clawed is hot, and feline physical attributes (slinky grace, speed, slanted eyes, claws, etc) are hot. Being dominated by a cat is hot because they're cruel, selfish and indifferent: being a cat is hot because of the "being a pet" aspect of submission, being adored/stroked/cosseted/found cute. Feline pouncing/playfighting/playfulness is a kind of brattiness I can enjoy: misbehaving and being punished for it, but misbehaving in a slinkyslycute way rather than in a stroppylittlegirl way.
Smoking
Not much of a fetish really. This is more about style. As a smoker, for me it's connected to the retro-fetish, being a flapper, being liberated and adventurous under the watchful eye of someone appreciative. Enjoying smoking when someone's watching my lips is the closest I get to being toppy, really, and even then it's more to do with "being decorative/appreciated" than "being in control".
Cigars - I've never been penetrated by one but it might be fun. My fetish for Doms smoking is about cigars and pipes - retro fetish, smoking as the thing done by the debonair person in command, smoking as a symbol of wealth/power, smoking as a direct demonstration of power, like someone making me wait for them to finish smoking while I'm not allowed to smoke, smoking as a demonstration of the Dom taking their pleasure. I have a fetish for others taking their pleasure of me, in me, and despite me, which are all slightly different.
Latex/rubber clothes
This is about being the object of desire, and about sensation - caresses through stretched rubber are more intense in a way than caresses directly onto skin. I like the sense of enclosure and restriction, like corsets. I like being someone else's fetish, and, well, my lord likes me in latex.
Cannibals
This is slightly complicated. Yeah, Poppy Z Brite's Exquisite Corpse was really hot and I find the idea of being murdered so that someone can dine on the flesh of my inner thighs faintly exciting, but for me the eating-people kink is very specialised. It's about being prepared and served as food. The best articulation of this if you don't see the point is Muki's Kitchen. I think I can break it down as follows: Objectification, being treated as or made into something less than fully human (i.e. dead, lower in the food chain, used by others regardless of my consent/safety). Being appreciated. Serving the appetites of others, literally. Food as art, being a decorative object. Physical sensations: being trussed/hogtied, being immobile/helpless, being oiled or rubbed down with things (like salt or garlic). Penetration (insertion of fruit/vegetables into mouth/orifices). Being treated roughly, with no regard for my comfort (which is connected to my fetish for being washed/scrubbed roughly, which is connected to the "being a servant/slave/child" thing). Being opened, exposed, having my legs held apart, having things inserted. Being spit-roasted (combination of anal/oral forced penetration). Being enclosed (i.e. in the oven). The heat thing doesn't do it for me particularly, nor does the "being killed" bit in itself, but the rest... oooohh.
Doll fetish/human furniture
Fairly straightforward: objectification, immobility, helplessness, being useful, being used, being owned.
And connected to both the "being eaten" and "human furniture": being eaten off. Being a table. Having hot sauce poured over me and licked off (or cold icecream: sensation play, helplessness). Having food inserted in me and then eaten. Being made to eat things that have been inside me. Having food crushed on me. Especially fruit: having fruit crushed onto my body is thrilling and destructive and so so hot. Strawberries being crushed onto my nipples or clitoris, the scraping of all the tiny seeds on the sensitive flesh, the blood-like messy spilling of juice, and then the erotic consumption, like I'm being chewed and swallowed but I'm not, it's the flesh of the fruit instead. Like I am the flesh of fruit.
Anaesthetic/mind-control
Again, an obvious subset of nonconsenual powerlessness/helplessness. Specifically, my fetish is for being forced to do things I like for other reasons. So someone using the above to make me do something outside my kink diagram isn't exciting for me. But being forced in this context to do something the other person finds sexy, being raped, being beaten, being made to do housework, etc, is.
Sacreligious sex
This is a power thing, I think. Immortals are more powerful than us: sexual contact with them therefore involves submitting to them or being overpowered. Also I find religious imagery aesthetically pleasing, especially old-fashioned/medieval/traditional/catholic stuff. There's a whole "history of oppression" thing that gives it an edge. I like shagging on altars because of the exhibitionist thrill of getting caught, the "shagging in public" thrill of doing something inappropriate, only with more edge because people would find it actively offensive.
I also like fucking on altars because of the magical aspect. I like sex magic, tantric sex, raising power through sex, combining sex with spiritual/religious/magical power.
Non-sexual penetrations
Bog-standard masochism/objectification, I think. Specifically I like spit-roasting and needles.
Hurt/comfort
This is my "being a victim" fetish. Connected to being helpless and being the centre of attention. I find the examples on the diagram kind of odd: "running mascara" isn't something I'd thought about before and is fairly specific, as well as being pretty much the same as "crying women". I like being helpless, being an invalid, being looked after and nursed, being bathed because I can't bathe myself, having good reasons to not cope/break down/let go (either physically or emotionally), being the wounded brave one, being comforted and admired for my courage. It's not a major fetish, but the aftercare is a big component of my attraction to CP.
School
This is connected to the retro-fetish and the CP thing. 'Nuff said.
Blood
Masochism and power. The adrenaline-surge playfighting messy smearing drinking kind of masochism. Being drunk from. Being painted on with my own blood. Someone delighting in my suffering. Big visual demonstrations of my suffering. Being whipped or caned until I bleed. Having the blood licked off. Having my blood given to me to lick from a finger. Being tied down and bled. Sharp, cold, delicate, exquisite sensations. Careful operations, being kept immobile. Being a religious or magical tool or sacrifice.
Medical procedures
Being anaesthetised, immobile, captive, helpless, in pain, a victim. Cold impersonality of the person doing things to my flesh. Medical bondage: connecting this to the bondage thing. Bandages and examining tables/leg stirrups are nicer than plaster casts.
Hair
My own hair: having my hair pulled, hair bondage (being the victim of violence). Having it stroked, brushed, washed (being looked after). Other people's hair: being whipped/stroked with hair (helplessness, sensation play). Brushing/playing with/plaiting/caring for/washing other people's hair (serving others).
So rather than the big categories in the above diagram, I would say my categories are something like:
being: degraded | appreciated (passive/active)
the victim of violence | looked after
^
masochism | nonconsensual submission > powerlessness - helplessness - objectification - exhibitionism > consensual submission | 1700-1900
^
being: used | less than human | owned | a plaything - decorative object - pet - prize possession | useful
Only much less linear than that. The physical fetishes all tie into one of the above psychological fetishes (masochism, helplessness, etc) and everything else overlaps in complex ways. Immobility, for example, is connected to masochism (being that tightly restrained is usually painful) but also powerlessness AND helplessness AND being an object/less than human, as well as being submissive if undergone voluntarily.
(The following isn't not exclusive, because I'm not sure I'm capable of articulating every single fetish I have, and also fetishes are catching, so I'm sure I'll accumulate more from lovers at some point.)
"Classic S/M" - spanking, piercing, branding, suspension, heavy bondage, cutting, blood
Slightly annoying they don't distinguish between giving/receiving, and don't give CP its own category. Also disappointing that D/s isn't here. Yes, embarrassment and non-consent can be part of D/s, but why isn't the root fetish here?
Suspension and decorative bondage are a different fetish for me than D/s or sexual bondage, closer to corsetry or fetish heels than submission. Decorative bondage, suspension, rope corsets are for me about body-as-canvas, like modelling, which is about a combination of objectification and exhibitionism with the physical pleasure of restraint/pain for the sake of aesthetics. It's about showing off, being attractive for the pleasure of others, pride, objectification, becoming a decorative object. (Like pony play and connected to human furniture).
Added to the above list of specific "minor fetishes" within s/m (wtf? Spanking totally isn't a minor fetish) I'd have added caning as a specific fetish, beating with implements in general, hair-pulling, pinwheels (as distinct from piercing), scratching with nails (as distinct from cutting), face-slapping (as distinct from spanking), and wrestling/punchplay as a form of sadomasochism. Both being punished (personal; degraded) and being used (impersonal; someone taking pleasure in me). Painful bondage (although maybe that's what "heavy bondage" means), painful tight-lacing, painful fetish heels are all s/m-related but fit into the "decorative" category, which leans slightly more towards submission in the same way that caning, for me, leans slightly more towards masochism.
Clothing: military gear, lingerie, corsets, stockings, gloves Military gear: only if pre-C20th. C17th-18th land militia preferred over naval uniforms. Cavalry is the best. This fetish is about "things I like someone topping me to be wearing", although I admit I also get a kick out of wearing it myself in a pulling-rank scenario. Oh, and pretty girls in pre-C20th military drag.
Lingerie: this is more about the "being found pleasing" thing than anything else. Liking for stockings is based around my Doms appreciating them; similiarly my suspender belt thing is because I'm told it provides a beautiful frame for CP play. I quite like the whole "being slutty" game as well, with (e.g.) black lingerie still carrying associations of being a harlot in this culture.
Corsetry: As explained above. It's part of the overall retro-fetish I have (fashions and styles from 1700-1900 are sexy). It's also about pain, decorativeness, aestheticism, body modification, and the edge that makes it really, really hot is from the whole history of oppression associated with women being forced to wear uncomfortable and damaging clothing.
Gloves: mainly associated with retro fetish (see Sarah Water's Fingersmith: nobility wearing white gloves permanently, and the intimacy associated with removing them). Conversely, being caressed by someone wearing silk/velvet/leather gloves is hot not only because of the different sensations, but the impersonality/lack of intimacy implied.
Shoe fetish
Specifically, high heels that are restrictive/painful. This is mostly a D/s thing, strongly associated with the "decorative objectification" thing.
Pony play
OMG this gets me so hot. As far as I can tell, the breakdown goes as follows:
Physical sensations: restrictive harnesses (sense of enclosure around head/body), restricted vision (blinkers), restricted movement (hoof mittons or arm lacings). Exercise as a fetish: specifically, being forced by use of whips or other implements to exert oneself. Bits are connected to gags in being an oral bondage fetish. Tails attached by use of butt plugs as part of the fetish for anal sensation, specifically forceful/painful anal penetration. The hoof boots are the restrictive/painful high heels fetish. The riding crop aspect is bog standard s/m. Submission that is enhancing rather than degrading: the decorative thing, being a pretty object/pet, existing for the pleasure of others, being the centre of attention, being shown off to enhance the status of another, being proud and beautiful and wilful yet still submissive, possessed, controlled, thus increasing the power/meaning of the submission. Pulling a trap/carriage on which one's master is riding is connected to the "human furniture" thing: being genuinely useful to one's Dominant, serving them in actual and practical ways.
Cat play
This is much less of a thing for me, and is largely connected to the wrestling/playfighting/scratching fetish. Also growling at each other is hot, being overpowered/clawed is hot, and feline physical attributes (slinky grace, speed, slanted eyes, claws, etc) are hot. Being dominated by a cat is hot because they're cruel, selfish and indifferent: being a cat is hot because of the "being a pet" aspect of submission, being adored/stroked/cosseted/found cute. Feline pouncing/playfighting/playfulness is a kind of brattiness I can enjoy: misbehaving and being punished for it, but misbehaving in a slinkyslycute way rather than in a stroppylittlegirl way.
Smoking
Not much of a fetish really. This is more about style. As a smoker, for me it's connected to the retro-fetish, being a flapper, being liberated and adventurous under the watchful eye of someone appreciative. Enjoying smoking when someone's watching my lips is the closest I get to being toppy, really, and even then it's more to do with "being decorative/appreciated" than "being in control".
Cigars - I've never been penetrated by one but it might be fun. My fetish for Doms smoking is about cigars and pipes - retro fetish, smoking as the thing done by the debonair person in command, smoking as a symbol of wealth/power, smoking as a direct demonstration of power, like someone making me wait for them to finish smoking while I'm not allowed to smoke, smoking as a demonstration of the Dom taking their pleasure. I have a fetish for others taking their pleasure of me, in me, and despite me, which are all slightly different.
Latex/rubber clothes
This is about being the object of desire, and about sensation - caresses through stretched rubber are more intense in a way than caresses directly onto skin. I like the sense of enclosure and restriction, like corsets. I like being someone else's fetish, and, well, my lord likes me in latex.
Cannibals
This is slightly complicated. Yeah, Poppy Z Brite's Exquisite Corpse was really hot and I find the idea of being murdered so that someone can dine on the flesh of my inner thighs faintly exciting, but for me the eating-people kink is very specialised. It's about being prepared and served as food. The best articulation of this if you don't see the point is Muki's Kitchen. I think I can break it down as follows: Objectification, being treated as or made into something less than fully human (i.e. dead, lower in the food chain, used by others regardless of my consent/safety). Being appreciated. Serving the appetites of others, literally. Food as art, being a decorative object. Physical sensations: being trussed/hogtied, being immobile/helpless, being oiled or rubbed down with things (like salt or garlic). Penetration (insertion of fruit/vegetables into mouth/orifices). Being treated roughly, with no regard for my comfort (which is connected to my fetish for being washed/scrubbed roughly, which is connected to the "being a servant/slave/child" thing). Being opened, exposed, having my legs held apart, having things inserted. Being spit-roasted (combination of anal/oral forced penetration). Being enclosed (i.e. in the oven). The heat thing doesn't do it for me particularly, nor does the "being killed" bit in itself, but the rest... oooohh.
Doll fetish/human furniture
Fairly straightforward: objectification, immobility, helplessness, being useful, being used, being owned.
And connected to both the "being eaten" and "human furniture": being eaten off. Being a table. Having hot sauce poured over me and licked off (or cold icecream: sensation play, helplessness). Having food inserted in me and then eaten. Being made to eat things that have been inside me. Having food crushed on me. Especially fruit: having fruit crushed onto my body is thrilling and destructive and so so hot. Strawberries being crushed onto my nipples or clitoris, the scraping of all the tiny seeds on the sensitive flesh, the blood-like messy spilling of juice, and then the erotic consumption, like I'm being chewed and swallowed but I'm not, it's the flesh of the fruit instead. Like I am the flesh of fruit.
Anaesthetic/mind-control
Again, an obvious subset of nonconsenual powerlessness/helplessness. Specifically, my fetish is for being forced to do things I like for other reasons. So someone using the above to make me do something outside my kink diagram isn't exciting for me. But being forced in this context to do something the other person finds sexy, being raped, being beaten, being made to do housework, etc, is.
Sacreligious sex
This is a power thing, I think. Immortals are more powerful than us: sexual contact with them therefore involves submitting to them or being overpowered. Also I find religious imagery aesthetically pleasing, especially old-fashioned/medieval/traditional/catholic stuff. There's a whole "history of oppression" thing that gives it an edge. I like shagging on altars because of the exhibitionist thrill of getting caught, the "shagging in public" thrill of doing something inappropriate, only with more edge because people would find it actively offensive.
I also like fucking on altars because of the magical aspect. I like sex magic, tantric sex, raising power through sex, combining sex with spiritual/religious/magical power.
Non-sexual penetrations
Bog-standard masochism/objectification, I think. Specifically I like spit-roasting and needles.
Hurt/comfort
This is my "being a victim" fetish. Connected to being helpless and being the centre of attention. I find the examples on the diagram kind of odd: "running mascara" isn't something I'd thought about before and is fairly specific, as well as being pretty much the same as "crying women". I like being helpless, being an invalid, being looked after and nursed, being bathed because I can't bathe myself, having good reasons to not cope/break down/let go (either physically or emotionally), being the wounded brave one, being comforted and admired for my courage. It's not a major fetish, but the aftercare is a big component of my attraction to CP.
School
This is connected to the retro-fetish and the CP thing. 'Nuff said.
Blood
Masochism and power. The adrenaline-surge playfighting messy smearing drinking kind of masochism. Being drunk from. Being painted on with my own blood. Someone delighting in my suffering. Big visual demonstrations of my suffering. Being whipped or caned until I bleed. Having the blood licked off. Having my blood given to me to lick from a finger. Being tied down and bled. Sharp, cold, delicate, exquisite sensations. Careful operations, being kept immobile. Being a religious or magical tool or sacrifice.
Medical procedures
Being anaesthetised, immobile, captive, helpless, in pain, a victim. Cold impersonality of the person doing things to my flesh. Medical bondage: connecting this to the bondage thing. Bandages and examining tables/leg stirrups are nicer than plaster casts.
Hair
My own hair: having my hair pulled, hair bondage (being the victim of violence). Having it stroked, brushed, washed (being looked after). Other people's hair: being whipped/stroked with hair (helplessness, sensation play). Brushing/playing with/plaiting/caring for/washing other people's hair (serving others).
So rather than the big categories in the above diagram, I would say my categories are something like:
the victim of violence | looked after
^
masochism | nonconsensual submission > powerlessness - helplessness - objectification - exhibitionism > consensual submission | 1700-1900
^
being: used | less than human | owned | a plaything - decorative object - pet - prize possession | useful
Only much less linear than that. The physical fetishes all tie into one of the above psychological fetishes (masochism, helplessness, etc) and everything else overlaps in complex ways. Immobility, for example, is connected to masochism (being that tightly restrained is usually painful) but also powerlessness AND helplessness AND being an object/less than human, as well as being submissive if undergone voluntarily.